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This website has brought me so much knowledge and some of the answers I have been wondering about for years.

My baby girl was born Feb 20, 1965 London Ontario Canada. I wasn't told there was a problem, my pregnancy was what I would call normal as far as I knew. I had a gynaecologist taking care of me, I went the full 9 months so much time has passed and my memory has faded but the only thing I can recall is that I did have an x-ray taken about 3 weeks before she was born.

My Dr decided after waiting the 3 weeks and 9months he would induce me Saturday morning. I was feeling as if I had a great pressure when all of a sudden I had a mask put over my face and was put out.

I came to Saturday late in the day to find my husband beside me, looking very sad. He just said the Dr called him aside and told him the baby girl was born with her brain out the back of her head. I was hysterical and asked what they were going to do, he told me the Dr said she could live 2hrs, 2days or 2weeks. With that the nurse came in and gave me a needle.

When I woke up the next morning not one nurse mentioned the baby, or the fact that I had a baby. I asked a nurse where she was and said I wanted to see her, her answer was "Oh you don't want to see that" Again I became hysterical, and another nurse arrived with a needle.

I don't' remember anything till Sunday afternoon, when I remember I asked again to see her, the answer was the same No !! I was overcome with emotions and told them I wanted to see my Dr. Well they must have called him, because he did come in, said I could go down in a wheelchair Monday morning.

Still not knowing any details. They did wheel me down, and they had a blanket covering the back of her head. I was only there a short time, looking through the glass.

Monday they told me they were transferring her the children's hospital.

I must have been on a lot of medication because things were and are very foggy.

I realized I was in a room with a young girl not married, nursing her baby, who she was giving up for adoption. I couldn't bare to be there and on Tuesday my husband asked for them to move me to another room. The other room wasn't much better as I was in with a girl 8 months pregnant with an inner ear problem.

I was discharged and my Dr just told me "NOT to beat my head against a brick wall" trying to figure this out.

Shelley died 2 months to the day she was born.

We were never allowed to hold her, we could just stand and watch the nurse work her cheeks to drink her bottle. I missed so much now that I've read your letters.

My story is so different from what they would do today if this happened.

I was pregnant again 4 months later with it being the exact same pregnancy, feeling wise, but had a perfectly healthy little girl I called Jody. She is 44 yrs old and has 2 healthy children herself.

Thank you for letting me tell my story.



Last updated May 3, 2019